Aaron needs new thongs!

Don't you just love Aarons attempt to get a little more wear out of his shoes.....

Jon's night on the town

Aaron and Jon organised a 'boys night' so Jon could get back on the single social scene. They arranged for a few other boys to join them to act as wingmen for Jon. The night was meant to be about helping Jon get some random drunken pashes and generally feel good about himself again. In preparation Jon went out and got a new hairdo (black with red streaks) and had his eyebrow pierced again and changed the bolt on his nipple ring. He also went a bought himself a $90 shirt from a trendy shop. So he was all set for his big night on the town.

Before the boys left the house they got warmed up with about 7 Strongbows each plus 3 shots of Canadian Club. They were feeling pretty pissed and fired up about the night ahead. I drove them into the Paddo, singing along to Aaron and Jon's karaoke CD (awesome!). After I dropped them off I didn't expect to hear from them again until the next day. That didn't end up happening. At about 1:15 am I get a called from a somewhat distressed, annoyed, angry and drunk Aaron. He began to regail me with some of the events of the night........

(I'm going to list them in bullet point form)

• Before they even left , Jon asked to borrow my tweezers so he could pluck his upper cheek hair. Then he had dilemmas as to how he should tzj (you know the Queer Eye saying, I don't know how to spell it) his shirt sleeves.
• Jon continuing his drinking at the Paddo by downing another 10 or so drinks in a very short space of time.
• Jon's inability to walk in a straight line and complete lack of direction walking to the Voodo Lounge.
• Jon being denied entry to the Voodoo Lounge for being too drunk.
• Jon going missing at the Paramount (around the time I got Aarons phone call)
• Jon vomiting all over himself - which entailed vomiting on his new shirt, his pants and shoes.
• Jon misplacing his phone somewhere (which explains why Aaron couldn't contact him)
• Jon somehow loosing his glasses - they possibly could have fallen in the toilet.
• Jon having to get out extra money for a taxi home. Unbelievably he remembered his address.
• Jon not being able to score - why wouldn't the ladies be turned on by a large man, very pissed and covered in vomit.
• Jon loudly entering the house at some point this morning shouting out "Aaron are you home?" in a somewhat distressed voice.
• Jon's bedroom reeking of vomit this morning. I so almost hurled when I went in there!
• Jon declaring he'd like to do it all again. But perhaps next time not get so pissed so he can pick up the ladies.

That's Gold Jon

Mmm.....cutlets

DISCLAIMER: I did not come up with this poem. It is written by a guy named Marco. He has two blogs and this one comes from one of them. I've added links to them - so go check them out.
I'm putting this poem up for two reasons - one is that I found it funny and clever and two is that I can appreciate a good cutlet because I too am a Wog (cleverly disguised as a skip). Enjoy!

I like cutlets, yes I do.

They come from a cow, that goes moo.

I like them crumbed, I like their batter.

I’ll have a cutlet that’ll make me fatter.

Dipped in egg and maybe flour.

I could eat them every hour.

I like cutlets, yes I do.

When I don’t get them I go “boo hoo hoo”.